"Bankruptcy stared me in the face, but one thought kept me calm; soon I'd be too poor to need an anti-theft alarm." Gina Rothfels
"Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless." Bill Watterson
"Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!" Anne Tyler
"It is in his pleasure that a man really lives; it is from his leisure that he constructs the true fabric of self." Agnes Repplier
"I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on." Jean Kerr
"As for butter versus margarine, I trust cows more than chemists." Joan Gussow
"Do not trouble yourself much to get new things, whether clothes or friends.... Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts." Henry David Thoreau
"The dying process begins the minute we are born, but it accelerates during dinner parties." Carol Matthau
"Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits." Mark Twain
"There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all." Robert Orben
"No man's credit is as good as his money." E.W. Howe
"Having money is rather like being a blonde. It is more fun but not vital." Mary Quant
"The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears, or the sea." Isak Dinesen
"The real problem of leisure time is how to keep others from using yours." Arthur Lacey
"This diamond has so many carats it's almost a turnip." Richard Burton
"Farmers are the only indispensable people on the face of the earth." Li Zhaoxing
"If the misery of the poor be caused not by the laws of nature, but by our institutions, great is our sin." Charles Darwin
"I fish better with a lit cigar; some people fish better with talent." Nick Lyons
"The greatest gift of the garden is the restoration of the five senses." Hanna Rion
"How can anyone govern a nation that has 246 different kinds of cheese?" Charles de Gaulle
"There is something self-defeating in the too-conscious pursuit of pleasure." Max Eastman
"Red meat is not bad for you. Now blue-green meat, that's bad for you!" Tommy Smothers
"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." Leonardo Da Vinci
"If nature had intended our skeletons to be visible it would have put them on the outside of our bodies." Elmer Rice
"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut." Ernest Hemingway
"The reward for conformity was that everyone liked you except yourself." Rita Mae Brown
"When in doubt, wear red." Bill Blass
"As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it." Buddy Hackett
"It is an unfortunate human failing that a full pocketbook often groans more loudly than an empty stomach." Franklin Delano Roosevelt
"Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell." Edward Abbey
Connected by: Uninet
